A few years ago, I was in Seoul and I met an ajumma in an eatery (an ajumma is an old married or unmarried lady in Korea who commands respect and does things her way).

She served us bibimbap (a Korean rice dish), which she prepared out of the gladness of her heart.  

She was thrilled and was laughing a lot; even though the wrinkles on her hands and the deep lines at the corners of her eyes were showing – marks of years of pain and hardship – at 68 years old, she was still jolly and excited.

I wondered what made her feel so happy. So, I asked. With my Korean friend helping to translate into English, she answered that she had learned how to deal with all the changes in her life.

I followed up by asking how she was doing it. She responded: “In every change in my life, I pick a flower and pin it on my chest. The bigger the change, the larger and more colourful the flower.  That way, every time I look at myself during the day, I know that I am dealing with a change; I am learning and growing with it. It becomes easier for me to adapt.”

That was when I noticed a sizable Rose on her white hanbok (a Korean women’s dress).

“So, what change does that flower symbolise?” I asked.

“New boyfriend!!” she answered excitedly. I almost dropped my bibimbap bowl.

If we start shaping our inner strengths when accepting the change, we can be helpful contributors on this planet

– Ron

Changes are inevitable. We have already learned to acclimate with them in our own small ways. And for many, it is just very natural.

When the weather is sunny and it suddenly rains, we grab an umbrella. When the bus doesn’t arrive on time and we are late for work, we walk or take a cab. If the electricity shuts down and the lamp is out, we light a candle.  If only we could extend the same manner of responses to the substantial changes in our lives, then our day-to-day life journey could be less arduous.

Over the years, my relationship with change has been evolving continuously.  I have realised that the only way to deal with, and adapt to, a change is to change too.  I don’t try to ignore it any longer.  Nowadays, each time I see a change coming, I no longer automatically hit the panic button.

The change in my attitude does not make the changes go away.  On the contrary, they seem to multiply and divide themselves (yes, it’s like mathematics).  I also notice that I am becoming more aware of the changes in my life, which is its way of saying that I must be prepared for the responsibility that a change will bring along.

Once, I was in Singapore, and I noticed a change in me. I gained weight – probably because I had eaten a lot of street food in the last three days.

In an instant, I gained a couple of kilograms. I thought to myself, “Hmm, this must be what they call…Instagram.”

 I welcomed the change with humour.

We don’t have to pin a flower on our chest every time we are faced with change (though no one is stopping us, by the way), but we must stop trying to ignore it. 

If we start shaping our inner strengths when accepting the change, we can be helpful contributors on this planet (and throughout the universe), who will always know how to pursue the next goal and our approach to the future.

So, this Christmas and holiday season, let’s all embrace change and welcome it.  Change is not our enemy. It is our life companion.  It happens when we are busy with life. When we treat it as a friend, anxiety is diminished. And as we also seize, cradle and understand it, the opportunity to grow and mature becomes a higher possibility.